Infinite Monkeys

Bush-whacked!

The landscape has been altered. My naive little world has been changed. No, it's nothing political. Someone stole a planted bush from my front yard last night. No, not the sago palm that was just sitting there in a decorative pot. Not any of the kids' toys. Not the nice patio chairs. Somebody stole a bush that I planted in the ground, I don't know... two years ago.

Now the word "manicured" is not something that would normally apply to my yard. But right along our front entry, we planted two manicured "pom-pom" style bushes that played against the stonework for a geometric 50's/60's feel, setting the tone for our interior. So it's not like these are just some old scrubs that were here when we moved in, that we don't give a rip about. It's not so much the cost of the bushes, but the amount of time that went into the upkeep of the matching pair. Now, to quote Tones On Tail... there's only one!

Witness the scene:

That's where is used to be. This picture doesn't really convey the depth of the hole. Note the enriched soil, now sun dried, spread across the bricks and walkway. The trail of dirt and leaves leads off between our cars, out to the street.

Here's the remaining bush alongside the hole from the photo above.

Here's the trail of soil and twigs leading down the driveway. It continues onto the sidewalk, then disappears. Obviously there was a getaway vehicle involved. After more snooping, my wife noticed that there are extraneous cuttings and yard debris where our plant's dirt trail ends at the street, including a flower not found in our yard, or any close neighbor's. Assembling the clues, my Mrs. Monkey seems to have hit on a very plausible theory: some landscaper in need of a plant and short on time or money (certainly on scruples) found a quick fix on the way to, or on a resource-hunting detour from, a job.

So here's what we're left with. The sad thing is, I bet that there's a local landscaper who knows where to find just the thing to match my remaining bush.

Perhaps we could pass this post around the Phoenix area blogs. "Have you seen a bush matching this description?"

Posted by Brad at May 18, 2004 05:55 PM | TrackBack